Managers who are introverts can suffer from a severe lack of confidence in their abilities. This is because the perceived skills that make for a great manager don’t seem to gel with those naturally shown by introverts.
This isn’t true. Some of the best managers who I’ve worked with have been introverts.
But… I’ve also seen introverted managers struggle to become effective managers because they’ve not been able to overcome the challenges they face.
So, let’s start with those challenges and then we’ll move on to how you can overcome them.
Challenges faced by introverted managers
Let’s start by talking about some of the common challenges that introverted managers are likely to face.
The expectation to be a visible leader
Generally, managers are expected to “show” that they are leading a team, perhaps by being the loudest, speaking the most or leading all meetings. We can then fall into the trap of attempting to meet this expectation when, in reality, we don’t need to because being a great leader doesn’t mean you have to be loud or hugely visible.
Resolving conflict between team members
At some point, you’ll probably need to resolve conflict or tension between your team members. This can be tricky for anyone, but even more tricky for introverts because direct confrontation can be challenging.
Managing energy levels
Introverts typically use up a lot of energy during social situations and of course, managers usually have a lot of social situations included in their day-to-day work, including:
- Team meetings.
- Client / stakeholder meetings.
- One-on-ones with team members.
- Ad-hoc meetings to work on problems.
Just these alone can mean a good number of hours each week are spent in social situations.
As a result, introverts need to proactively think about how to manage this energy and how to recharge it.
Delegating effectively
As we’ve discussed, introverts can struggle with constant social interaction and another unintended consequence of this is that they can avoid conversations where they need to delegate work to individuals or teams.
As a result, they’re more likely to keep work to themselves and keep things within their control. Keeping control can also mean that they don’t need to worry about follow up social interactions such as giving difficult feedback.
How to lean into being an introverted manager and be successful
I should be clear here that I don’t believe that we can fundamentally change our personalities, at least not with something as deep rooted as being an introvert or extrovert.
I do believe that we should always strive to be better and that part of this means doing things that may make us uncomfortable. So there is a line to walk here between acknowledging (and accepting) who you are as a person, whilst not accepting that this defines you 100%.
Here are a few ways that you can lean into being an introverted manager whilst still pushing yourself to improve.
Be a proactive, active listener
Introverts will typically listen more than they talk. This is a fantastic, yet underrated skill as a manager. Most managers fall into the trap of talking more than listening because that’s what they think they should be doing.
As an introvert, this will feel uncomfortable to you. So don’t fall into the trap.
Instead, listen intently to your team when they want to speak and be fully present with them at that moment. Not only will they notice and appreciate that you’re listening to them, but you’ll pick up on more information and respond in a thoughtful way.
Most managers will listen to their team but not be present. They will just be thinking about what they are going to say next, as opposed to actually listening.
Focus on meaningful, one-on-one relationships
Being an introvert doesn’t mean that you don’t enjoy talking or interacting with people. It just means that you only have a certain amount of energy for social interactions and group/team conversations can use up this energy quickly.
As a result, you can lean into this by allowing yourself to focus on the time that you spend one-on-one with a team member and use this as your opportunity to get to know them.
Ultimately, this is a much more effective way to use your social interaction energy.
Become a very good written communicator
This is a bit of a personal one.
(If you hadn’t guessed already, I’m definitely an introverted person!)
There are various forms of communication that we can use in the day-to-day management of our team. As an introvert, anything where you are “on show” or the center of attention is likely to make you uncomfortable and use your social interaction energy faster.
Whilst this is going to be necessary sometimes and you can’t avoid it, you can still lean into other forms of communication that don’t zap your energy quite as quickly.
For example, you can become more proficient at writing emails, documents and even Slack/Teams messages.
Early in my own career, I realised that I really didn’t like using the phone to call clients. I didn’t avoid it completely, but I was able to reduce the amount of time I needed to be on the phone by writing well structured emails.
Create a cool, calm and collected environment
Many introverted people will not show emotion easily – which can be a problem sometimes! But generally, it can also be a strength, particularly when running a team.
If a big problem or challenge appears, you’re less likely than an introvert to show panic, anxiety or stress to your team. Of course, you may be feeling all of these things internally! But the fact that you internalise the initial emotional response, process it and then decide what to do, can be a huge strength when running a team.
Your cool, calm and collected approach can lead to a team that trusts you, doesn’t panic and knows that they can bring problems to you without fear. It’ll also make it more likely that your team will respond in similar ways when they are presented with problems and challenges.
Does all of this mean that being extroverted is a problem?
I wanted to finish by addressing this question because I’m very aware that everything I’ve written so far may imply that being extroverted as a manager is a bad thing!
To be clear – I’m not saying that.
Everyone is different and in this article, I’ve chosen to lean into the introverted side of things. But the underlying point here, regardless of being introverted or extroverted (or a bit of both), is that we all need to be aware of our strengths and weaknesses, then lean into our strengths to get the performance and improvement that we want.
If you can take a step back and look at the bigger picture of your strengths, then lean into them, you’ll be much more likely to succeed as a manager and individual contributor.
